The Week in ICA, 070309

Kinda taking stock of the week past.

some facts
12 hours of ICA classes / 6 hours coaching / 1 hour being coached / arranged 1 trial session I’m taking and 1 I’m receiving

powerful conversations: Wendy, Kristen, Janet, Emma, Paulina, Neesha, Ripley, Chiao, Yuki, many ICA classes (more, but this comes to mind)

new ideas: I’d have my “ideal” coaching site automatically schedule, handle payments and prep for my trial and as-needed sessions (bodywork and laser and regular coaching), linking these with preparatory and background material, and feedback opportunities (coaching, facilitation and bodywork / Chinese and English) / coaching is Bodhisattva work … like Brenda said of me after the dialogue circle (how do I make a living from Bodhisattva work?)

words: noone will be turned away for lack of funds (what would happen if this is how I operated? what if I added “as long as this cares for me”) / you should be able to do “X” with a gun held to your head. the truth is that time IS holding a gun to our heads” (reading openinng pages of ThePath) / brain-based coaching … I’m not this mis-match of unconnected things … it DOES go together. Research involved. Shows value of having insights and consciousness. Scientific proving ground for coachees. / “beer o’clock” / people often believe that what comes naturally to them is nothing special, and that everyone has it, when in fact that’s their uniqueness … so help them bring that out and forward / I think of it like quicksand, if you struggle you drown, Instead you need to lie back, spread out arms and say THIS IS HOW I COACH, let’s see how we go. Warn them from the beginning and they’ll not be surprised. / I like to work with people through careers. I get a retainer. / As the people develop and learn, the externals mean less and less. / I have a daily practice called Daily review… look for judgments and reactions. Look for a pattern. Trying to see how I see the world. / Think how powerful it is that our teenagers are learning the power of response. Our work helps break the unconscious cycles. It’s powerful for tomorrow’s adults. And for our clients we do the same thing. / People come to us IN SIGNIFICANCE. / Power tools are about changing perspectives. / Teenagers are GREAT GREAT GREAT people to coach. / The power of natural consequences … / with family I encourage you to give them the material, tell them what coaching is, tell them that you’ll build through a series of sessions and in each session you’ll have 5 min to catch up and them move into the coaching for the day, ending in your learnings and actions / A reaction is an instant judgment. It is never entirely about the person provoking you. It is about how you look at the world. How you interpret this action. / Divide yourself into 2 parts the part that’s 100% in the process and experiencing whatever is going on and the part that’s observing the experience and your experience of it. / WE GET PRIMAL. WHEN our identity or self-esteem is threatened. / Walk the talk, be willing to also Talk the walk. / We have to be that ourselves before we can request that of others. / In the addictions model… one slip doesn’t make a FOOL, Fall / “I want you to know that I am very spacious about what happens. I hold a respectful space. / analogy. The GPS system in your car. It doesn’t shut down or refuse to work. It just says at the next safe location make a U-turn. If you decide to go this way, it goes right along with you. / If I look at the choice I DID make, it reveals what I am committed to. / When I have S it holds me accountable to be where I want when I want. / with coaching you See things quicker, take action sooner. / Try things… imagine that you’re in a laboratory… expand on what seems to be working… correct/realign things that aren’t. / Culture of people you want to serve becomes incredibly significant. / Having trouble connecting with the international research community? I coach in thought experiments, writing proposals, in research and in written and oral presentations. / ID a problem you SOLVE. While coaches don’t solve people’s problems, marketing DOES / feedback: your wonderful perspectives, willingness to take the lead and perhaps most of all your energy and acceptance! You indeed bring great things to class… I adore the Bodhisattva analogy!

Whose voice is that?
Does this make sense or not?
What is this situation serving?
What would have to fall away?
What’s the worst that could happen?
What would heart (or any chakra) say?
I’m wondering if there is a better word.
That’s great, except it’s getting in your way.
Does this support what you say you want, or not?
What’s some really good things about that happening?
What if I gave you permission to do it the way you do it?
Ya, know when you say ___ what does that mean for you?
What would happen if you just stopped struggling and was OK with it?
We have 20 minutes together. What would you most like to get out of it?
What’s the worst that could happen if you just moved with the leap of faith?
Remember when you said you HAD to do this for REASONS? Where are we at with that right now?
Where are we now, where do we want to be by the end of the session, and what’s the gap?
Is it effective? So you’ve employed this strategy of nagging/punishment and it’s still not getting any better, OK, so how’s that strategy working. On a scale 0 to 10, how is it working with 10 being totally effective.

resources: The Great Afterlife Debate / Mark Silver, writing coach / Institute of Psychotherapy and Counseling (Hong Kong) / fantastic coach site / Robert Heckerl, coachesp his background!! / a blog that looks like a full web site / triple blog site /

some highs: my work with my personal trainer coach, going to the gym for the first time and doing the assessment where I’m top of top (then they add “for your age group” and ms competition comes out, wanting to see my scores put up on the 20-year-old graph), ‘brain based coaching’ sounds like me, 4 niches (PhD+ researchers in Taiwan, expats wanting to make a life in Taiwan, healers in Taiwan, facilitators in Taiwan) and if I picked 1 it would be researchers (packet of skills — research process coaching, editing, coaching for english presentations) AND I’d offer healing work as part of our sessions.

some lows: burnout this afternoon (long week, early classes), trying to be awake enough at 5am when I went to sleep at midnight

learnings: (OK, I snuck a few in earlier, astute readers will note) the gym near my studio is actually fun, real ease with naming the researchers market, in all conversations a coach’s stance fits like a glove (editing client … asked powerful questions and big reframe in the conversation, easy to feel total connection and acceptance and the fit of our business was a separate matter we looked at together)
Somehow, things really feel to be coming together now. A lot of intangibles begin to feel tangible. It feels I’m OK being who I really am (I “know” this, but it “feels” so). There’s a website guy who can put a site up for under 150US… and instead of my perfect dream site, this is do-able, fast and a jumping board. (CORRECTION it’s 149E, not USD)

What’s my philosophy
I’m a transformative coach using brain-based coaching. In the spirit of participation, I believe each of us is a part of the puzzle and each part of us is also a part of the puzzle. Each puzzle piece is needed before the picture becomes whole.

My core assumptions are
– deep down you KNOW what you need

My skill is in setting up the conditions where that knowledge is most likely to be accessed and brought to life. I trigger or enable the releases and re-connections most favorable for your desired results. I energize your strengths, allowing your system to clear the blocks and allow for deep connections to take place with all aspects of yourself, aligning you toward your greatest gifts.

PROCESS: I follow the spirit, principles and law of Open Space Technology and the brain-based understanding of coaching. I invite and support you as you self-organize and re-shape yourself around what you wish to bring into your life. Before each session I invite you to name all the life questions or topic that you are ready to work on. In our sessions we review your learnings and develop one or more questions into powerful new possibilities you are keen to implement.

6 month coaching program – I begin with a 1-2 hr intake session to connect with you and your needs — your coaching intention, your personal strengths, the various facets of life, your values. From this we co-create practices and coaching focus together with assignments. In our coaching we follow how these are playing out in your life. I like to do a LOT for my clients, and this longer-term client allows that to happen. I like to send you articles and other resources, prepare audio or visual (not just text) support material, network, create forms for daily tracking of key activities and tailor games and challenges for individual clients.
1-off laser coaching sessions
12 45-minute sessions

What’s my model DUNNO

What’s my style
Lots of listening for: your strengths your life-enhancing factors/values, core elements of your thinking (strengthening and weakening), your intention and your context. I am bold and direct, empathic, compassionate and playful. I believe that each of us, and each part of each of us is holding a piece of the puzzle and the more parts that are recognized and made accessable, the more we can live out an empowered journey.

experential intention of this blog: leaves visitors feeling enriched, bathed in quick associations, story and connected to their own story.

rational intention for my web site: visitors know if they are my client, and if so, schedule a trial session, sharing background and intention and get their questions answered so that everything is set up for a successful trial session.

on the near horizon: Amazon order (since death/dying books and other key readings aren’t available in bookstores here).
a day to
– go through the boards
– capture my answers-of-the-day for the various classes, and final assessment (FC, A1, A2, PT, BC)
polish my welcome packet
– revise all the pieces
– translate into style-compatable Chinese
– take to a great layout and printing shop (Roma’s!!)
– get as hard-copy and as PDF and as forms for pHp
ask: What would they like from me as their coach? Give an example list.
ask: How responsible are you for your life? (On a scale of 0-10, where 0 is “not at all”) Briefly comment:

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